My meditation journey...
I had been interested in meditation for a long time but couldn't get the hang of it, no matter how hard I tried. After many unsuccessful attempts, I concluded, it wasn’t for people with busy minds, and that was the end of that. .
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About a year later, after an exceptionally long work week, I wanted nothing more than to relax on the sofa with a large glass of wine. As I prepared to unwind, I suddenly felt the urge to try and meditate once more, all rather strange as I hadn’t given it a single thought since giving up. My conscious mind was strongly opposed to the idea, it just wanted wine, but despite the inner conflict, something stronger willed me on. I sat down, closed my eyes, and silently counted my breaths for about 5 minutes or so. It became a text book session, as muscles relaxed, tension melted away, and thoughts settled down too (at least for the most part) When my mind became distracted, I redirected my attention to the feelings of relaxation in my body, then went back to counting breaths. Around 10 minutes or so later, my heart rate really slowed down, breaths were almost imperceptible, and I lost awareness of my body. Conversely, I was aware of the “disconnect” and observed it, for just a few moments, with mild curiosity, until blissful feelings engulfed me. Of course, I wanted to stay there forever, however, was far too inexperienced to maintain it. Very soon, excited thoughts flooded in, doing their very best to analyse this wonderful and unique experience. Nevertheless, my feelings of elation lasted well into the evening as I contemplated meditation "success", without the wine!
From that moment on, I was hooked, setting my morning alarm10 minutes earlier to practice before starting my day. Admittedly, it wasn’t all “heady bliss”, some days were challenging, especially when my mind wandered throughout the entire session. I slowly learned to let go of chasing the bliss, and saw every day as an opportunity to explore techniques, occasionally incorporating breath work After a few weeks, I felt more energetic and eager to start the day. The benefits continued, things that once bothered no longer did, concentration improved, as did my focus. I went from noting so many changes, to the realisation that my overall wellbeing was benefitting greatly.
This simple process, set me on an incredible journey of self-discovery unlike any other; for that I am eternally grateful. And whilst it is not the panacea for all of life's challenges, for me, it's as near as it gets!
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